Dracula Full Audioplay
AUDIOPLAY
SCENE ONE – A TRANSYLVANIAN WEDDING
| All | Once upon a time in Transylvania… |
| Friar Helsing | I pronounce you man and wife. |
| All | Congratulations, Simon! |
| Simon | Thank you. |
| All | Congratulations, June! |
| June | Thank you. |
| Mr. Smith | Congratulations, my boy. |
| Mrs. Smith | Congratulations, son. I am crying. |
| All | Awww. |
| Simon | Thank you, mum. Thanks, dad. |
| Mr. Baker | Congratulations to you both. |
| Mrs. Baker | Yes, I am so proud! |
| June | Thank you, mum. Thanks, dad. |
| Friar Helsing | Before you go, take this garlic. |
| Simon | Thank you, Friar Helsing. |
| June | Friar Helsing is an expert at karate. |
| All | An expert at karate! |
Friar Helsing does karate moves. Everyone cheers and claps.
| Simon/June | We are going on a honeymoon! |
| All | A honeymoon! |
THE HONEYMOON SONG
I am Simon, I am June
We are going on a honeymoon!
He is Simon, she is June
They are
going on a honeymoon.
Honeymooning by the sea
Honeymooning, you and me
Come on honey, let’s go soon
We
are going on a honeymoon!
I am Simon, I am June
We are going on a honeymoon!
He is Simon, she is June
They are going on a honeymoon.
(x2)
SCENE TWO – THE JOURNEY
Simon and June leave on a motorbike and after a while they stop. A crazy old lady appears.
| Simon | Can you help us? |
| June | We are lost. |
| Crazy old lady | Don’t go to the castle. |
| Simon/June | What? |
| Crazy old lady | Don’t go to the castle. Don’t go to the castle! |
| June | Simon, go! |
They drive through the forest and meet some wolves.
| Wolf 1 | We are scary wolves! |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 2 | Really scary wolves! |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 3 | We are servants of Count Dracula. |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 4 | The scariest person in Transylvania. |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 5 | We are going to eat you. |
| All | Ouuuuuuuuu! |
WOLF RAP SONG
Now’s the time to say goodbye
Scary wolves make you cry.
Nowhere to run, nowhere to
hide
Say your prayers, it’s time to die!
We live to serve Count Dracula
He’s our Lord. Ha ha ha!
Nowhere to run, nowhere to
hide
Say your prayers, it’s time to die!
Our teeth are sharp, our eyes are keen
Scary wolves are strong and mean.
Nowhere to run,
nowhere to hide
Say your prayers, it’s time to die!
Scary wolves are in your town
Scary wolves tear you down.
Nowhere to run, nowhere to
hide
Say your prayers, it’s time to die!
| June | Simon, go! |
Simon and June escape the wolves. Then Igor’s carriage appears and the motorbike crashes into the carriage.
| Simon | Are you ok, June? |
| June | Yes, are you ok Simon? |
| Simon | Yes. |
| Igor | Mmmm nice to eat. |
| Simon | What?! |
| Igor | Nice to meet you. |
| Simon | Oh. Can you help us, please? |
| Igor | Mmmm nice and tasty. |
| June | What?! |
| Igor | Why so hasty? |
| June | Oh. We are cold and tired. |
| Igor | Mmmm come with me. |
They get in the carriage.
| Igor | Say goodbye… |
| Simon/June | Aaaahhh! |
| Igor | … to your motorbike. It’s broken. |
| Simon/June | Oh! |
SCENE THREE – BACK AT THE WEDDING
| All | (Still singing) He is Simon, she is June, they are going on a honeymoon… |
| Mr. Baker | What a beautiful wedding! |
| Mrs. Baker | The best! |
| Mrs. Smith | I like your karate, Friar Helsing. |
| Friar Helsing | Thank you. |
| Mr. Smith | Yes, it’s very clever. (Mr. Smith tries to do karate moves) Ay-ya-ha-wooooa! |
| Mrs. Smith | Stop that! |
| Mr. Baker | Look! A big bat. |
A bat appears.
| Dracula | Good evening, friends. I am Count Dracula. Nice to meet you. Don’t be scared. Everything is ok. |
| Mr. & Mrs. Baker/Smith | Everything is ok. |
| Dracula | I am a friend. (He gets closer) |
| Mr. & Mrs. Baker/Smith | You are a friend. |
Dracula gets very close and bites them. They turn into vampires.
| Dracula | Follow… Follow… |
| Mr. & Mrs. Baker/Smith | Follow… Follow… |
They follow him.
Friar Helsing shouts after them.
| Friar Helsing | Dracula! |
SCENE FOUR – Dracula’s castle
Simon and June in the carriage with Igor.
| June | Look! A castle. |
The carriage stops.
| Igor | Renfield! |
| Renfield | Coming!… Yes, Igor? |
| Igor | Wake up Dracula. |
| Renfield | Yes, Igor. |
| Igor | Follow me. |
They enter the dining room.
Dracula enters.
| Dracula | Welcome, strangers! I am Dracula. Please sit. Sit! |
They sit down.
| Dracula | Renfield! |
| Renfield | Coming, master! |
| Dracula | The soup! |
| Renfield | What? |
| Dracula | The soup! The soup! |
| Renfield | Yes, master. (He turns around) Don’t get cross. |
| Dracula | Aaaahhh! Don’t say that word! Cross! |
| Renfield | Sorry, master. (He returns with the soup) Here you are. |
Renfield serves the soup.
| Dracula | Now go away! |
| Renfield | Yes, master, sorry, master. |
| Simon | This soup is red. |
| Dracula | Yes. |
| June | Is it tomato soup? |
| Dracula | Yes… tomato. |
They drink the soup.
| Dracula | Igor! |
| Igor | Yes, master. |
| Dracula | Take them to their beds. |
| Igor | Yes, master. Follow me to your doom. |
| Simon/June | What?! |
| Igor | Follow me to your room. |
| Simon/June | Oh! |
They follow Igor.
| Dracula | Come to me, vampires! |
Three female vampires enter.
| Vampires 1, 2, 3 | Tell us your wishes, master. |
| Dracula | (Using his hypnotic tone) Make sure they stay in the castle. |
| Vampires 1, 2, 3 | (In hypnotised tone) Yes, master. They stay in the castle. |
| Dracula | Ha! Ha! Ha! |
The three vampires look at Dracula, then at each other.
| Vampires 1, 2, 3 | Ha! Ha! Ha! |
| Dracula | Stop it! |
| Vampires 1, 2, 3 | Sorry. |
SCENE FIVE – IN A BEDROOM IN THE CASTLE
Simon and June prepare to go to sleep.
| Simon | Goodnight, June. |
| June | Goodnight, Simon. |
| Vampire 1 | (Runs towards Simon and screams) Aaaaaaahhhhhhh! |
| Simon | What are you doing? |
| Vampire 1 | This is your candle. Goodnight. |
| Simon | Oh, ok. Goodnight. |
| Vampire 2 | (Runs towards June and screams) Aaaaaaahhhhhhh! |
| June | What are you doing? |
| Vampire 2 | These are plugs. For your ears. Goodnight. |
| June | Oh, ok. Goodnight. |
| Vampires 1, 2, 3 | (Run screaming to both of them) Aaaaaaahhhhhhh! |
| Simon/June | What are you doing? |
| Vampires 1, 2, 3 | We want to… drink your blood. |
Simon and June run out of the room followed by the three vampires.
They pass three creepy paintings
that come to life and then they enter a room with four coffins.
| Simon | Look! Coffins. |
| Simon/June | One… two… three… (They open the first coffin) |
| Simon | Mum! |
| Simon/June | One… two… three… (They open the second coffin) |
| Simon | Dad! |
| Simon/June | One… two… three… (They open the third coffin) |
| June | Dad! |
| Simon/June | One… two… three… (They open the fourth coffin). It’s empty! |
They turn around and see Mrs. Baker standing there.
| June | Oh, hello mum. Mum?! |
| Mr. & Mrs. Baker/Smith | We want to drink your blood! |
| Simon/June | Aaaahhh! |
They run away screaming.
SCENE SIX – In the forest
| Friar Helsing | Here I come, Dracula! |
He begins his journey and meets the wolves.
| Friar Helsing | Oh no! Scary wolves?! |
| Wolf 1 | We are scary wolves! |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 2 | Really scary wolves! |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 3 | We are servants of Count Dracula. |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 4 | The scariest person in Transylvania. |
| All | Yeah! |
| Wolf 5 | We are going to eat you. |
| All | Ouuuuuuuuu! |
WOLF RAP SONG
Now’s the time to say goodbye
Scary wolves, make you cry.
[…]
| Friar Helsing | Stop! I know karate! |
He does his karate moves and the wolves clap and cheer.
Then he beats them up one by one and they
fall in a pile.
| Friar Helsing | Where is the castle? |
| Wolves | (Dizzy) That way. |
SCENE SEVEN – DRACULA’S CASTLE
| Dracula | Good morning, friends! |
| Simon | We want to leave. |
| Dracula | Leave? But it’s breakfast time. |
Dracula places a napkin around his neck, then shakes salt on June and pepper on Simon.
| June | Why are you putting salt on me? |
| Simon | Why are you putting pepper on me? |
| Dracula | Because you are the breakfast! |
| Simon/June | Aaaahhh! |
| Dracula | Wait, what is that smell? |
| Simon | This garlic? (Taking it out of his pocket) |
| Dracula | Yes! Arghhh! (He falls to his knees) Renfield! |
| Renfield | Coming, master! |
Renfield enters and sees the garlic and takes it from Simon.
| Renfield | Ha! |
| Dracula | (Getting up) Ha ha ha ha ha! |
Friar Helsing enters and sees the garlic and takes it from Renfield.
Renfield runs away
terrified.
| Friar Helsing | Ha! |
Friar Helsing threatens Dracula with the garlic.
| Friar Helsing | Any last words, Dracula? |
| Dracula | Well… maybe… a song? |
| Friar Helsing | A song?… Ok. |
DRACULA SONG
Dracula, Dracula
La la la, la la la.
Dracula, Dracula
Ha ha ha!
(x2)
Where are you Dracula?
I’m in here. La la la.
What are you Dracula?
A vampire. Ha
ha ha!
Dracula, Dracula
La la la, la la la.
Dracula, Dracula
Ha ha ha!
(x2)
I go out every night
Near and far. La la la.
Close your eyes and sleep tight.
Dracula. Ha
ha ha!
Dracula, Dracula
La la la, la la la.
Dracula, Dracula
Ha ha ha!
(x2)
I’m cold and old
I’m mad and bad.
But really really
Really sad.
Dracula
La la la.
Dracula Ha ha ha!
I’m all alone
In my home.
With my heart
That is of stone.
Dracula, Dracula
La la la, la la la.
Dracula, Dracula
Ha ha ha!
(x4)
They cry.
| June | That is so sad. Poor Dracula. He is nice. |
| Dracula | Really? You don’t hate me? |
| June | No. Look everyone, Dracula is nice. |
| Simon | Be careful! |
| June | It’s ok, Simon. Dracula is nice. |
| Friar Helsing | No! June, be careful. |
| June | What? |
Dracula bites her and she turns into a vampire.
| Simon | Nooooo! |
June goes to Simon. Friar Helsing takes the cross from around his neck and he throws it towards Simon.
| Friar Helsing | Simon, catch! |
Simon stabs Dracula with the cross.
June becomes human. Suddenly Dracula comes back to life
laughing. He is still alive.
| Simon | June! The doors! |
June opens the castle doors and the light comes in.
| Dracula | The sun! Noooo! I’m melting, meeeeeeltiiiiiiing… |
| Simon/June/Friar Helsing | Yay! |
| All | Yay! |
| Friar Helsing | Well done, Simon! Well done, June! And now you’re going on a honeymoon! |
THE HONEYMOON SONG
I am Simon, I am June
We are going on a honeymoon!
He is Simon, she is June
They are
going on a honeymoon.
Honeymooning by the sea
Honeymooning, you and me
Come on honey, let’s go soon
We
are going on a honeymoon!
I am Simon, I am June
We are going on a honeymoon!
He is Simon, she is June
They are going on a honeymoon.
(x2)
Dracula Audioplay
© 2023 Action Theatre – www.eLearningactiontheatre.it
All rights reserved: Learning English Through Fun s.r.l.
Authors: Rupert Raison, Hamish Stansfeld, Oliver Millingham
Illustrations: Massimiliano Feroldi
Graphic Layout and web design: Alberto Bonis
Text Editing: Giorgia Nordio, Sara Corbelletto, Thomas Raison, Chiara Bozzalla
Project Supervisors: Rupert Raison, Giorgia Nordio, Lisa Pugliese
Actors: Rupert Raison, Samuel Toye, Aimee Hislop, Lucy Cooney, Juliet Chappell, Robin Kuhr, Brittany Martillo, Ina Lar, Juliet Turnbull, Sara Corbelletto, George Mouskoundi
Recording Studio: Audionauta dP Studio
Special thanks to Andrew Ox for his musical contribution
